Rewrite My Ex: Haiku

Craigslist 'Casual Encounters' Personal Ad Cheating Boyfriend Fun Revenge Payback

The original craigslist.org 'Casual Encounters' personal ad (one of them, anyway) my cheating boyfriend -- oops, I mean EX-boyfriend -- placed is below. Since he claims he never met anyone as a result of this, I thought perhaps a rewrite of his ad might make cheating more successful for him in the future. Rewrites were collected from a number of people and the creative results will be posted as I get permission from the authors to do so. Submit your rewrite today by clicking here. Thanks to all for your submissions - let's read!

4th weekend needs some fireworks!

I'm having a super relaxed Saturday afternoon and would love to make this one of the best three day weekends ever! I'm not experienced at all with these Craigslist ads, in fact every time I've ever tired to post something here, the only responses I've received were from ads and spambots. I hope I can turn that around today!

I'm 35 years old, in good shape and looking for a good time. I'm looking for a lovely lady that wants a little attention this evening. Lonely moms and housewives, mature ladies, thick girls, are what I prefer ... I'm clean, I strictly believe in safe sex and I'm open to meeting somewhere for a drink and a little chit chat to break the ice. My place is quiet, there's always a drink on hand and I'm definitely 420 friendly if that's your thing. There's even a pool here if you want to take a dip. I like a woman who is aggressive and isn't afraid to say what she wants. Me? If I end the weekend and get a little oral action in the process, I'll go back to work on Tuesday with a huge smile on my face. I'm looking for something this evening, so this gives us plenty of time to exchange pics & have a conversation - I'm on AIM and Yahoo instant messenger. Let's talk!